In the BB Guide to Self- Validation, we learned that we are all so unique and beautifully made. Being our complete selves and taking up space is so important. We have the ability to build ourselves up and we do not need the opinions of others to know that we are worthwhile. But…sometimes comparison and jealousy will still set in.
We all do it. Every once in a while, that green-eyed monster will creep in an we will get jealous and envious of what others have or have accomplished. You will see another’s journey and look at yours and start to feel inadequate, or lost, or stagnant. You might feel like they’ve accomplished so much while you haven’t. Or you might feel like they have so much while you may not. We all know social media is a big proponent of this.
It’s time we stop comparing our lives to other people’s lives. Stop comparing our struggles to other people’s struggles. And stop comparing our journeys to other people’s journeys. Periodt.
“Comparison Is the Thief of Joy” -Theodore Roosevelt
Life is short. It is my goal to make sure my baddies are living their best lives by bringing in all the wonderful and happy things into their lives and not focusing on being jealous of others, comparing themselves with others and focusing on any other things that make our experience on earth painful, or malcontent. Focusing on unnecessary, low vibrational and, often times, false thoughts does not fall in line with living our best lives or being a bad bitch.
In this guide I have comprised some thoughts and sentiments to remember when you start to feel jealous, as well as a few tips to eliminate comparison all together. Keep reading below.
Think about this…You can think something but you do not know that it is true until you really know.
Have you ever created a whole story in your head or a scenario that you swore were facts, until you asked someone about what you thought to be true and it was the complete opposite?
Have you ever assumed something to be true but it turned out to be an overactive imagination and overthinking masked as false intuition?
Have you ever received part of a story and assumed you knew the whole story, and started making plans based on half information?
I definitely have. Prime example – Wondering why someone was not texting me back, spiraled into me being so sure that they were texting who I considered to be competition, which turned into me becoming jealous and almost flying off the handle from pure assumption and a jealousy induced rage, or anxiety.
I’ve learned that asking the questions can eliminate a lot of unnecessary drama.
You can not be too afraid of the answer to ask the question – Iyanla Vanzant
Remember that your thoughts are not always based in reality or true.
At the same time the grass may look greener but there is always more to the story. A person may have something you covet but who knows what they had to do to get it. Additionally, they may have one thing that looks great but are lacking in so many other ways. You never know the full truth of a situation.
Do not be afraid to ask questions.
This will eliminate comparison, drama, pointless jealousy and envy.
Whatever you are jealous of, remember that you can have it to.
Most of the time we feel jealousy or resentment because deep down we want what they have. Well, I’m here to tell you that we can absolutely have what they have.
If I’m jealous because I see someone with a “perfect” body, and I’m not doing all I can to become happy with my body…what am I really feeling these covetous feelings for? I am not doing all I can for me.
If I’m feeling jealous because I see my friend has an adventurous life, with lots of friends, and travels often, and I want that too, there is a fairly simple solution. I need to go out and create that for me too.
“If you want a 1% life you need to do 1% work – Gary V”
Create the life you want.
Ok, now it is true that some circumstances are out of our control. And maybe you’re not jealous but you are comparing your circumstance to others and are not happy. This is where gratitude comes in.
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Gratitude is the most important tip in all of this. It is essentially the cheat code for happiness
“Gratitude is the healthiest of all human emotions. The more you express gratitude for what you have, the more likely you will have even more to express gratitude for.” —Zig Ziglar
We must be grateful for wheat we have, what we are going to receive, what others have been given, our protection, our blessings in general. There are so many things to be grateful for
I have said it before that we have a say in our happiness and in our lives in general. It is wasted energy to wallow in jealousy when we could be doing what we could to create our own wonderful, exciting, adventurous lives. If you want it, be happy that others have this fantastic thing and figure out how to create it in your own life too. But above all of that – be grateful for what you have been given today! Sometimes we get so caught up in our daily grind that we forget that we have been so immensely blessed. I want to encourage all of my baddies to take some time to practice gratitude.